i had a dream last night that i had extreme favor. this time, the favor was with a great military leader. this military leader had to make some difficult decisions in some difficult times. apparently, his arm was the strongest, moved the fastest, and was sent into the most dangerous places. i stood before them having seen that he had shaved all their heads and then given them a drink that would, in the weakest ones, cause a mark to appear on their heads. after they drank it, he told them that the ones who had a mark appear on their already bald heads, he would dispose of. they were too week to bother continuing feeding. they only had enough food and drink to sustain the strong ones. they stood at attention, not knowing their own fate, unable to see if there was a mark on their own head or not. there were soooo many of them, lined up at 5-yard intervals. my heart ached to see these lives squelched, and by their vary own leader. but, with this leader, i had EXTREME favor. he not only didn't mind me living, he saw it as an advantage that i ate of the best they had. i ate what was on reserve for the highest military leaders such as himself. he also gave me rights to ALL the personal items belonging to those who were being weeded out his army. one-by-one, as they were disposed of, i was brought bag-by-bag their personal affects to choose to keep as my own or to trash. during my disposing of the first few bags of the dead, i was emotionally wounded...literally sick over the killing of these formerly strong brave men and women soldiers...so much that i hardly looked to claim any of their belongings. i made trips to a military secret base to store away anything i did not want. the first trip i made, i simply held up the goods and told them who sent me. each time after, they saw my face and waived me on...into the secret places, many levels beyond civilian access. on the next trip, i remember traveling fast - cutting the wind from point A to point B and with a lump in my throat, speaking out in my spirit language, and the one traveling with me speaking back that there was a plan. my next time back to where the troops were camped, i opened the bag and found a stack of childrens little train books and those were the first of many things that were given to me that i accepted from this general...this one was a gift for Israel. How could I say no? i could not, with honor, show anything but thankfulness for these "spoils." were i to show sorrow or judgement, none of these things would be mine, as the general would be offended. i woke up before i opened anything else, but there were many many men to go and more than i could ever ask for was to be found within their belongings.
wow, thank You God! i have a lot of processing to do, but i'll be back here to unwind this thing...
in the bags i was presented was more than i could use, but also plenty of all the things i could use: the best books and toys for Izzy, cash, gift cards to all my favorite places, deeds to homes all over the world, deeds to boats and automobiles, the finest jewelry including but not limited to wedding bands, bank account and safe deposit box information, coats boots and hats for immediate use, and the best personal care items.
what i could use, i claimed, what i could not use or carry i put in the secret place. a storehouse, have you. and my identity was the only thing that got me by.
i'm realizing how important it is that we are ourselves fully - that we come into the identity He has for us. there's soooo much more to unravel. i'll be back again later.
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